In flux.

Neither here, nor there,
We wait.
Wanting here, yearning there.
We wait.
Here in the waiting room,
Of life.

For life.

---

We are the tormented novelists,
Not the protagonists.
Suffering, creating brilliance,
Not guaranteed of a happy ending.


~Sam

Peace and Poignance

Things are so poignant sometimes.
Simple things, daily things.
The leaf lying on the grey road,
Unremarkable, old,
And yet I want to take a picture.
The tilted bench against the brick house,
The grown puppy teetering around the door.
Nothing new.
All routine sights,
And yet, I want to capture them all.

-----

Just a mood.
When your mind is scattered,
Unfocused, adrift,
A certain sadness hanging,
In the dusty shelves that comprise it.
Just a mood.
When you can wander every-any direction,
Direct your steps here,
Then there, at anyone's beck,
And call.
Just a mood.
When you're peaceful,
Not worried, not thinking,
Just looking and seeing.
At one with the world.
At once away from it.

-----

Why is it associated with sadness,
That peace,
That comes with calm,
That comes with acceptance,
That comes but so rarely in our existence?
Why is it associated with sadness,
That emptiness,
That connection,
Which comes with nature,
Which drains and nurtures?
Why is it associated with sadness,
That bliss,
That emotion,
That for which we have no name.
That for which we have no name.


~Sam

I've known how to write since kindergarten, but I still don't know if I'm any good at it. Who would have thought that phrasing the right words together could  have been so damn difficult?

~Sam

Dancing in the Shadows

I paint a picture of an eerie horizon,

That whispers songs of death and agony,

And there I stand for all of eternity,

Drowning in a poisonous black lake

Somewhere far beyond,

There's a place,

Of music, dreams hope and love

And I parade in its shadow like a marionette.

Great  flesh eating ghouls gnaw at my skin

And the dark spirits are devouring my soul

Slowly

And painfully

Till it is almost gone

And then give it back

To dance all over again.

I wrote this spontaneously one evening while I was staring at the buffer screen of the horrible stream for the Reading and Leeds festival. What is it, you may ask? Only the best music festival in England. There, were all of my favorite bands performing under one(or two) roof(s) and here I was, sobbing frantically, assessing my situation.

Be happy.

"Why won't you let yourself be happy?"

"What is there to be happy for?"

Be happy for yourself. Be happy for your life, that it has form, even if it is not perfectly moulded yet. 

It may be the peace before or after the storm, but it is still peace. Be happy for that peace. 

Be happy because things are not sad. Crave, but be content. Be happy for everything you have, even if it is not all you want. 

Be angry when things go wrong, be sad when things are bad, but be happy when things are okay. 

Let things be okay. When life is not going out of its way to be good-but it is not going out of its way to be bad-be happy then.
Things will always be wrong, things will always be right. Heal the bad, be happy for the good.
Be happy. 

~Sam